My dad is a physical education teacher at an elementary school. He’s nearing retirement, but he still goes to work each day in a gymnasium.
He coached elementary school level basketball and wrestling. He is obsessed with football and basketball at the college level.
That’s usually what he does on Saturday mornings in the fall. March is also a hard time to find him.
When I was born, there was an assumption that I would somehow be gifted in terms of sports.
I’m not.
I find everything about team sports incredibly boring.
And I’m a heterosexual white male!
I’ve always liked animals and natural history. I’ve also enjoyed politics and history.
I’m a bookworm. And everyone knows I love dogs.
My dad is into these things, too, but he’s less interested in natural history and biology than I am.
But my dad never forced me to like sports.
When the family would go to football games at the local high school, I never tagged along. There were some people who thought my dad only had a daughter, because my sister was a majorette with the band. She was the feature twirler for most of her high school career, and she became famous for twirling a fire baton.
I can’t find my ass with both hands.
I’m sort of a certified nerd. I am not a computer geek, as Dave will clearly attest.
But I was able to become what I am because my dad let me become myself.
That’s a very important lesson he taught me.
He never taught me this outright.
It was just something I realized as I’ve matured.
My dad could have had me into all sorts of sports. It would have been great for his ego.
But he didn’t.
He let me become myself.
And for that I’m always going to be grateful.
From this lesson, I have come to understand that maybe we’re pushing our dogs too hard.
We seem to expect dogs from certain breeds to be a certain way.
But there are many who aren’t.
Miley isn’t a real retriever, despite her genealogy and phenotype.
However, she’s a good dog. She is very smart and very well-behaved.
Too many people want to live through their kids and through their dogs. They force them all the time become something they are not.
I guess they just didn’t have the dad I had.
And they will never learn this important lesson.
They never can let things become.
They always want the bludgeon it until it becomes exactly what they want.







Your blog-job is to call dogdom as you see it. Your dog’s job is to be your buddy. It looks like you both are winners!
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What a lovely, lovely post. Well done, mate.
“When I was born, there was an assumption that I would somehow be gifted in terms of sports.
I’m not.
I find everything about team sports incredibly boring.”
You will be readily accepted in Greater Toronto Area. All of our professional teams suck.
Thanks for sharing from your life. There is lot of learning from this post.
Oh Scotty! I have missed you!
Your dad was a wise man. He gave you tools and equipped you to build what you wanted of your life. I personally hate sports because they bore me.
My family has over 200 years of military service. I so wanted my daughter to go to the Military Academy, but she chose another path. I am hoping my younger dau
When I finished high school I decided to join the army and elements of my family were very upset by this (though they would never admit this now). My father accepted my decision and took me to the interviews and accepted my choices, though I knew he wanted more from me. Now many years later as a civilian when I draw on the skills I acquired as a young digger I am grateful for his wisdom and acceptance. Like you Scotty I saw my father for the great man he is.
Our last dog was a trained assistance dog (GSP x Doberman)and when she retired we let her be what she wanted to be until she died. The leash was off so to speak. She loved her life but I’m pretty sure she really loved her retirement. Thanks for a great post mate.
Oh well, I guess I was expected to be a world famous journalist!
And here I am, nothing but hooked in working labradors – and in the Internet…